Monday, September 10, 2012

It's called surrendering....

Not too long ago I found myself in a situation where life seemed to be hell bent on getting the best of me.  I sat at my computer intent on working but I was slowly collapsing under the weight of things.  My job titles are rather extensive, as I am sure are yours. 

I felt the need to take out what I was feeling on the keys that sat innocently under my fingers.  With each letter, a word formulated.  With each word, my thoughts progressed.  It is funny how sometimes my fingers move faster that my brain or maybe it's this southern drawl.  I can type faster that I can hear myself say it in my head.....

When the need for a response leaves you paralyzed for fear that you're going to get it all wrong and make things even more of a mess than they already are; or simply when any step feels like the wrong one and if you move or maybe even breathe, your whole world is going to shatter and the pieces will be unsalvagable; or that gut wrenching anxiousness that screams this mess is all your fault, how do you pull it together?   Over and over the thoughts turn, if only this or if only that.   Why...why...why?

I typed the above paragraph, let out a deep breath as I cringed, and then it happened.  He spoke to me.  Right there in a makeshift office better known as poolside where I sat to be close to my children as they swam and played the summer afternoon away so carelessly.  Nothing scared or holy about this place.  I was not bowed or on bended knee and certainly my eyes were not closed.  But nonetheless, He spoke to me.  Away my fingers went once again, taking record of what I experienced and what I heard Him saying.

But in an instant, You have spoken peace over me.  That gut wrenching anxiousness has become the tight contractions of labor.  The urges to push and prevail.  The stretching . And I hear you say, "Relax into me for I will labor this with you."  The thought is almost to much to bear.  "I will labor this with you.  I will see you through this if you will only but relax into me.  Don't you see, you were created to birth, to bring forth life, to labor for the beauty of what is to come."

The idea of relaxing in labor seems a farce.  But after three natural childbirths, there is much truth in the act.  It is possible to labor with a measure of ease.  You work with the labor instead of fighting it or rather denying it.  God does not ask us to deny what we feel instead He asks that we invite Him in to it.  Could this be "co-laboring" with God?  Our labors are in vain if not co-labored with Him.  

With Him, we can do anything.  Conquer fear.  Say no to anxiety.  Demand that our emotions stop dictating our actions.  Declare we walk in wisdom and discernment.  Put an end to the lying and manipulating spirits that set to control us.

God will re purpose our pain and hurt, sorrow and disappointment, fear and anxiety.   And there is "NOTHING" that He can not redeem but can only do so in our willingness to relax into Him.  As a familiar song reminds me, "Lay back against Him and breathe, feel His heart beat."

Isaiah 40:29 He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak.

Isaiah 41:10  Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, surely I will help you, Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.'

1 comment:

  1. So glad you finally posted this. I have thought of it several times since you shared it with me and felt others would be encouraged by it.